Morning

What’s the time? Alright. A quarter to seven. Fifteen more minutes. To sleep. Stretching the left leg. Why can I only ever hear my left ankle? The right one bends and stretches quietly. I can’t sleep anyway. Bathroom. Today, I do my yoga. First thing. Oh, in a minute. Let me sit outside for a little first. It’s not good to smoke on an empty stomach. Dad said this many times. He never did, he said. I will stop one day. Today is not the day. Nicotine relaxes the brain. Yoga will be easier after. Let me sit down to wake up slowly. Where is the iPad? I opened it to start the yoga app, not to play solitaire again. Alright. Get up. Get the mat out. Start the Yoga Smart Coach. Stop playing solitaire. Click Start. Whole body fat burning. Fifteen minutes. It’s seven thirty. Deep breath. Plank. Downward facing dog. Bend your left knee. Put your left foot between your hands. How am I going to do that? Lunge pose. Can you feel the burn? Sure. Left leg on fire. Drifting thoughts. In one direction. Deep breath. Be in the now. Here. Listen. Follow the video. Bridge pose. Roll down your back. My back does not roll. Core strength cushions its flat fall onto the mat. Final relaxation pose. Finally. Palms facing up. You can stay in this pose as long as you like. I hear. And I get up. The coffee maker just finished. Remember to always make the coffee before yoga. With Milk? She said I should be careful with dairy. Something about inflammatory. My joints. A little bit can’t be bad. Hey, Siri. Set alarm for nine forty-five. Bagel in the toaster. Tidy up the kitchen. A sip of coffee. You should drink more water. Let me get some water from the fridge. Tidy up yesterday’s pots and plates. Let me turn on the radio. Some water. It’s so good to make your own soda. I have to press my ear against the dishwasher to check whether it’s on. It is. These machines are reliable. Press the right button and they start. Immediately. What am I gonna do now? If it takes two or three minutes, do it right now. How much time do I have? Where did I put the coffee mug? Good, about an hour. Read the news. HuffPost, Tagesschau, CBC, Guardian. There is pain in this world. Focus. Answer that email. You wanted to write to S and B. Do it today. First, order milk. Yes, pay for shipping. You are self-isolating. Order done. Got the shoelaces and yoghurt, too. Nine forty-five. Breathe.

I read the other day that my routine is not having a routine.

This represents another week – eleven – in my 52-week writing course Uncovering the authentic self. Steadily catching up and tidying up … We are in week 24.

The prompt for that week was Rituals. You find the texts from other weeks in the category Shaping circles.